Case Study: Adam and Zoe
Adam and Zoe had tried unsuccessfully for years and eventually undertook three IVF programmes which were also unsuccessful. By the time they came to talk with us they had a real split agenda. Adam didn't want to keep trying. He felt exhausted by the cycle of anticipation and disappointment that seemed to him to rule their lives. He no longer wanted to be sexual and felt they had lost sight of their relationship. Zoe on the other hand was desperate to conceive and felt unsupported and rejected when she discovered that Adam no longer shared her dream of becoming a parent.
At Relate Adam and Zoe were able to talk openly, honestly and safely about their fears for their relationship, for Adam if they kept trying and for Zoe if they didn't. With the help of their counsellor they were able to explore if they could stay together as a couple given that they seemed to now want very different things and to reach a better understanding of what they now wanted to happen.