World Cup June 2010
Relate tactics for a family friendly World Cup
As World Cup fever takes hold, families across North Hampshire, are being offered advice from Relate, the relationship experts, on how to have a row free World Cup.
The World Cup and big sporting events can introduce an interesting dynamic to the family. It can bring families together as a shared interest or can cause rows as disinterested family members are bemused by the excitement a game can cause. For those where families are split it could mean they need to negotiate and compromise so that no one is excluded.
To share how families feel about the World Cup, Relate for Parents is running a survey to find out how families think the World Cup will affect them. Visit www.relateforparents.org.uk to take part.
Lin Griffiths, a relationship counsellor for Relate for Parents, defines families as fitting into three types:
Passionate together
- This family gets really geared up for the matches, they plan their timetable of which teams they want to watch and even have “family bets” on different team results. Meals are planned also around the TV even though this might be something they would not usually do.
Do: Enjoy bonding as a family and feeling united.
Don’t: Drink too much to avoid arguments. Also remember if a result doesn’t go England’s way don’t take your frustration out on each other.
Split family
- In this family opinions on the World Cup are split. Banter and bickering take on different levels and can be good-hearted or end in conflict.
- There is no reason why all family members have to be passionate about the World Cup. Those who are interested need to be able to enjoy it all and those who are not, can get stuck into things that they want to do separately.
Do: Compromise and ensure everyone is included.
Don’t: Be unreasonable – discuss events which are ‘unmissable’ and which are less important. Make sure you have a TV free zone and do something enjoyable together.
Disinterested together
The disinterested family are united – they may jointly share conversations about those who seem “obsessed” to them and for a time feel quite separate from their more passionate friends, work colleagues and wider family members.
Do: Enjoy going out during the key games and noticing how quiet everything is.
Don’t: Mock friends who like the World Cup – it is only for a few weeks, just grin and bear it.
Top tips for family harmony during the World Cup
1. If your partner and family are football obsessed and you are the one who isn’t interested” – let them enjoy it and plan to do something with like-minded friends – swim, meal out, cinema, shopping, take part in another sport!
2. Be prepared to compromise. Think about bartering, for example agree ‘‘I won’t moan about the World Cup if you promise we can have a football free night each week.’
3. Plan ahead to manage TV coverage. Trade a day or evening of sport for a day out with the family. Also make a plan for when it is over – so you have something to look forward to.
4. Keep alcohol consumption to a minimum. Alternate alcoholic drinks with soft drinks, or stick to tea and coffee.
5. If you feel passionately about your team or club, consider whether you are showing the same kind of feeling towards your partner or family. Let them know how much you care for them by telling them, and be open in your affection.
Relate for Parents provides support and advice for more than 10,000 parents each month, including step-parents, adoptive parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents and siblings. Free and confidential online support, including live chats and email responses real life stories, videos and podcasts are also available at www.relateforparents.org.uk as well as the new and unique Family Mapping tool, which helps parents understand their situation and how they can make changes for the better.
June 2010
